the 50% life

before i even get started, i implore you to not read this post.  its mostly for me to just type out some silly things.

I was thinking today about what am i really good at.  well, what i came up with was i’m really good at being average at everything.  I dont feel like i’m super great at something.  and when i find out i’m below average and there’s no hope of ever being good/great at something, i give it up.  Like for instance, golf.  or drumming. 

I hate to fail.  I play the percentages with everything.  I take the course where the chances i’ll succeed will outweigh the chance I won’t.

The reason i’m thinking about all this is i feel like everything i’m doing right now is in a downturn.  Its like I hit a peak sometime in late June and now its all coming back.  For instance, in the first half of this year I had a nice car that i thought would be with me for at least 5+ years, i was doing well at school, my bowling game was improving, I was playing poker well, the stock market was up, railroad school and a good job were ahead of me…it was all going good.  It was all above average.

Then BOOM.

In Mid-July it all started coming back to that mid point where things can only be average.  Car crash, stock market going down (when i’m starting to need money of course), bowling game is frustrating me, worst luck in poker, railroad school is over and i’m having to go through this cruel wait to hear about a job (spending $4444.00 on something that hasn’t come to fruition yet will do that).  and now i’m left trying to figure out what exactly is going well.  Not a whole lot.  But its all not awful either.  I’m still living rent free for instance.  I’m back to point A…life is just at a boring, frustrating, average point. 

Its time again for some above average things to happen.

Man I hope you didn’t read that.

I think for fun I should start posting percentages for success with whatever I post about (if applicable).

Like, say, the getting a railroad job thing…supposedly it was 90% chance someone who completes conductor training gets a railroad job (it said so on their program fact sheet).  So…haha…not surprising I took that “risk”…dont get me wrong though, I really wanted to work in railroading anyway.  I just wanted to increase my odds of doing that by taking the railroad training.  see how that works?

So thats today’s percentage- Chance I get a railroad job is 90%.